


what exactly are you?

by kichiii



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Derealization, dereality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-13 03:41:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28771755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kichiii/pseuds/kichiii
Summary: He was floating in the black, inkyness of the void.What was it like to experience things? Did it feel like you were going through different emotions; or was it like the heat of a star?He wasn’t sure.tw // derealization , dereality. if i tag this wrong tell me!
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s)
Kudos: 17





	what exactly are you?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is a ranboo fic.
> 
> If you do not like themes of derealization/dereality, then I advise you to not read this fic.
> 
> If I tagged it wrong, please tell me!
> 
> tw // dereality , derealization

What are you?

Time melts away at your skin, years upon years of stresses and doubts tear at your flesh, leaving it to rot. Nothing seems completely real anymore - everything feels fluid, slipping through your fingers. You wish to keep it, and hold it in your hand, but how do you do that?

You feel the pull of the stars weighing down upon you. It’s very real for a split second, then it’s not. Why are you panicked? You’re the composed of the same thing that stars are made out of - time and matter to form your body.

How do you grasp things? Nothing feels real. What is real? You’re nothing and everything at the same time, laying in the void of space waiting for something to come along to help you.

You’re as old as the universe, but as new as time. What is ‘real’, and what is fake? You can’t tell the differences between the two - needing someone else to explain simple, simple things to you when you know that they’re just physical matter and are just a hallucination.

You don’t understand. You can’t understand.

You cry when thinking, not understanding why it burns you. It doesn’t burn anyone else. Wilbur can yell while crying - and it doesn’t burn him, even if he’s a ghost. So why does this happen to you?

You’re just a puppet in their schemes. No-one’s your ‘friend’, they can’t be. Their lives are expendable as you are, except you’re wasting away as nothing compared to them.

He uses you. Everyone can use the amnesiac, with you not remembering exactly what happened when you leave their grasp.

You’re just wasting away, doing nothing with yourself. Why does your body exist - just to do nothing? You try to help the others, but get yelled at and hushed away by them when you slip up - or make mistakes. You try not to make it your fault, but it somehow aways is.

It’s not my fault. I didn’t do it.

Are you sure?

Yes. I.. I wouldn’t do it.

Can you be honest with yourself?

No. I can’t.

You carry around this book to log what happens from day-to-day life. If someone takes it, you’re dead. Dead to the world, dead to your friends. Your whole world revolves around this book.

The thought that someone could alter his memories makes him sick. He doesn’t like to think about these things - resorting to doing more mundane tasks that the others laugh at him about.

You’re glad that you have some friends in this ‘world’. Dream is nice, same with Tommy. You’re slowly becoming more skeptical of Dream - but he gives you things, and company, so why complain?

Are you friends with him? Or is he using you like the rest?

Why would he do that? He’s nice.

You’ve seen what he did to Tommy.

Yes, but…

Why can’t you remember what they did?

What?

You don’t remember You can’t remember You don’t **rememberYoucan’trememberYoudon’trememberYouCANTREMEMBER** -

**What does he remember?**

You remember trading books with Tommy.  
You remember laying in the void, space warping your body to what it is now.

Was it space?

I think so.

??????

What are you saying?

?????????????????????????

**Shut up.**

It’s always a battle with your mind, choosing what to remember - what to think about throughout the day. It’s exhausting, confusing and you wish that you don’t ever have to do this again.

You’re dragged back into thoughts and thinking by one of your ??????. It’s scary, having this happen in front of another ??????, but you get through it. You slowly realize that you are ????. You’re Ranboo!

...Right?

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!! As always, my socials are:
> 
> twitter: @lapisdei_  
> insta: @salinesol_
> 
> thanks again!  
> \- suki


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